Yes Men

I think there's a difference between blindly following an idea and arrogance. For the first to be true, wouldn't one have to understand the opposition? Wouldn't it be fair, if one understood their enemy's perspective? To think I am equal to my enemy, as in the same regards of having the right to live freely ... Not thinking of myself as more than, or more important of someone who has less than me. I've never understood the lack of humility my father possess whilst professing that he's a good representation of a Christian man ... 

He's charming and sauve, yes. And he's nice when he is in pursuit of something... But he isn't kind. He's generous with money, which is why I don't like to tell him I need it. I get that I'm super lucky, and that if I was in dire need, I'd probably ask him for funds... But I already know that money is from a place that Gertrude doesn't know of ...... It would track. He people-pleases to keep the peace... His peace. 

He follows people like Ben Shapiro... What a husk of a man... I'd feel sorry for ol' Gerdie... 

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The people who surround Skidmarks are yes men... And I'm not talking about THAT Jim Carrey film. Any one still in that dunce's orbit is a POS, let alone in support of... As long as they stay in his "good graces" and appease him, even if they KNOW the truth, they will keep feeding him lies and bullshit to keep their corrupt lifestyles of image and prominence. People who are entrenched in the lore of The Accused, people who are charmed by the image faux news projects... 

I have photographic evidence of my father wearing a Skidmark mask for Halloween, around 2006? ...he did once think of him as a fucking joke... What changed for him to recognize him as a smart business man? When will he wake up?

The blatant coke addictions and the obvious affairs with flying bedrooms on the American dime is horrendous. But boomers aren't shown that news out of Faux News... It's not on *their* TV, so it's not true... Blindly trusting the news is so stupid since they entered the sphere of ratings. Since you could get "the news" any time of day.... News became talk shows and throwing around one's opinion... Walter Cronkite would be rolling around in his grave if he knew what the "news" was about now... "Tell the audience whatever the station wants, so their chosen narrative can continue..." You make your reality your own, I get it. 

Idt boomers understand the Sunken Cost theory... I think they stand clear of embarrassment on their own behalf... Like, you'd have to be an ignoramus to still be backing Skidmarks at this point. 

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Y'all ever see the end of 'Batman Forever?' Jim Carrey as The Riddler was splendid, but the character's contraption to rule over people through TV, isn't that far off from today's reality. Especially with Faux News afoot.

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In 2006, I was in my late teens and for Halloween, I attended a party with my folks. Ol' Gerdie was an evil substitute teacher... And my dad dressed in a business suit and a thin rubber mask of Skidmark's likeness. He knew then that he was a JOKE... Wtf did his opinion all-of-a-sudden change?

I, however, dressed up as Pharaoh Hatshepsut... The only woman Pharaoh of ancient Egypt... I would tell people about her, when they asked if I was Cleopatra... Lol the fact I wasn't diagnosed until I was in my mid 30s is ridiculous... If you wear space as a pattern and like to have educational Halloween costumes... You're a wizard, 'arry.... 

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I wonder what my father would think of himself if he knew the autism came from Granna, his mom. Would he curse her? Would he deny it? Would he think less of her?

I don't doubt that man loves me, but he's unable to show up for me now. I'm old, I should be married and pregnant and barefoot by now, according to him and my "childhood" ... I should be a kept woman... 

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I love B so much, mostly because he has integrity. And he respects me and shows up for me, emotionally and physically. We might be working together soon, and it doesn't scare me as much as I thought it would. Maybe it'll soften me up? 

I know he treats me differently, but I also know he'd respect another queer autistic woman with mutual respect. Integrity is doing the right thing even when no one is around... You do the right thing even when there's no one to show-off for... 

Or to make it into some other storybook saga... Some big fish retelling of how you're the greatest...

My therapist told me my father still thinks of himself as my rescuer... As the hero of my life. He isn't a person I look to for advice... Not in about a decade. 

Let me reiterate.... I'd rather stand with Crickets on the correct side of history, than to stand with my father representing the family... Our family? 

I have a family reunion to attend in October... Dad's side. I'm pretty sure B will have put a ring on me by then, so he's coming too! We'll probably get our own room, however. Guh.

I wonder what he'll think of the rest of my family. He's met my cool as hell aunt... She's a good representation of the rest of the family. From my pov, my folks are the white sheep, and the rest are black sheep. Lol.

I had always thought Catholics were liberal bc my family was pretty Left for the longest time... Then the news changed their tune... NPR became too biased and full of agendas... 

Like what would change in one's faith to become an idiot follower? Is it just generational? Is it the mob mentality... He's never gone against the grain... He can never be the outcast or the punk. 

I say, follow the punks. Who were part of the counter culture? Who are the punks of every generation? Of every era? 

Grow a spine in spite of your family... Stop cowaring. Stop waiting for life to begin and begin it yourself. I get that there's pressure as a uterus owner to pop out babies and be someone's wife... Believe me, I get it... But I wouldn't change anything about my life because that would undo so much good in the world... I've learned a lot from my failures and missteps... To learn the dance of forgiveness is giving yourself patience for personal failings... Grace.

Idt Boomers have come to such conclusions... 

From failures, one learns. 

To double down on a failure to "save face." ...for whom are you are referring? Who are you saving the face of? 🐑🐑🐑🐑🐑🐑

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Snow.