Ties

I broke up with Ginger. He's still a good man, but I think I need and want more attention than what he had to spare me of his spoons. His family should and does take president... And I wish him the best. 

I have a date tonight with R tonight. Either sushi or wings, bc I've been hankering for both. He's a big 🍃head... And my new roommate has a high sensitivity that I 110% forgot about so I will need to set more clean boundaries if I continue this relationship. I am very interested in a Dynamic... We did have an errand date last week that ended in a good rainstorm/emotional cry and hand-holding affection... But I'm unsure if it would be healthy as far as the partying and alcohol culture he seems to participate in. It feels like I'd be going backwards and repeating my dating history. I met R thru volunteering at Dragoncon and I really like him as a person. 

What is the proper way to date as a Neurodivergent? My expectations are high for others... What's the end goal for most people nowadays? Do others even want marriage? I do not want to be pregnant again... Many reasons, obviously... But I definitely don't trust this country to save me if the same thing happens again and I rupture open... Scary thoughts. 

...and then there's B... I met B in improv 2 and he's taking improv 3 with a lot of people from our class... Plot twist, I signed up for improv 3, too, but it'll be a surprise! My work is actually reimbursing me, as I asked for it to be "character development" centered! Hazzah, free money! I have to pay like $50, but most of the class is covered and that helps.

B seems like a safe bet. Definitely was attracted from the beginning... Tall and bearded, you say? ...he's funny and kind and has big golden-retriever energy. I have read him as monogamous, but we have a date on Tuesday after our class that might yield a fun time... But I will have to divulge to him my relationship status with others. Or not? Red doesn't bother reading these. 

I would consider becoming monogamous again with the right person. I want to get married and have a reliable person as my best friend and hopefully it's mutual. Someone who can be DIRECT with me and make space for me, as I do for him. I was attracted to him from the first class on... And I hope to know him in the future.... He seems like a really good man. I don't want to cause him harm. I feel like I've been doing that...

We are going to see Sketch in theaters and I am excited. I will update once it happens... Maybe we remain friends... Maybe we become FWB who knows. 

Red is doing well, but we aren't as close as we once were. He has a back injury and has a weird idea that I just love him for physical reasons... Even though we have been platonic longer than being more... But I always enjoy hanging out with him and visiting his doggos. Even the asshole dog. I do find it funny that they listen to me over their dad. Lol. There's very little discipline at that house. 

...

...the move went well and I'll be talking with Shake on Monday morning. I hope to hear about his dating life and catch up on his side of the world... Lol. 


...
Update, date went well and I told him about my kid... We want a second date. I've been wanting to go to the Bittersweet exhibit here in Atlanta. Wouldn't ya know it, I have free tickets. 


...
Snow. 

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